Be Still and Know that I Am God.

When I started University, the first project that we were set was to create an image to express something of our personal identity. This could be done in any medium and so I chose collage.

I took a photograph of myself, cut it up and put the pieces back together, all higgledy piggledy. I made it look as though my head had exploded. Words spewed out of my head, representing my many thoughts at the time. I then coloured it with multi-coloured felt pens. The resulting picture looked much like one of Picasso's distorted faces.

As this image suggests, this was not the most peaceful of periods in my life. I missed my Mum and Dad. I missed my home town. I was overwhelmed by the new things I needed to do for myself. I was scared of the rough neighbourhood that I had moved into. I was trying to fit into the uni way of life, whist trying not  to compromise my faith.


I don't have the picture anymore, but I remember it vividly. Over the years, I've learnt to trust God more and worry less, but from time to time the 'Picasso' me begins rear her ugly, exploding head again.

I'm sure a lot of you can relate to it. Having so much you want to do and not enough time or resources to do them. That feeling like your chasing your own tail. Trying to be the perfect wife, mother, employee, friend, christian and failing miserably.

When I started this blog, I really wanted to post regularly, but recently life... just got in the way. I started a new part time job, which I love, but means time is a little tighter. Ruby had her first birthday and Christmas is rapidly approaching.

Sometimes, we just have to stop and realise what's important... and what's not. As christians we should have inner peace and if we don't, something's got to give. Would it really be the end of the world if I didn't get time to make my own christmas crackers or would Ruby be emotionally scarred if I bought her birthday card rather than making it?

I put ridiculous expectations on myself- I think many of us do. I take on too much and then wonder why I'm stressed.

It's good to have goals and want to be like the amazing woman in Proverbs 31. But at some point, we have to realise that we are only human.

I bought a book recently called 'Simply Wonderwoman: a survival guide for women with too much to do.'

I really love the idea behind this book. There are lots of tips and ideas for keeping on top of a life as a busy, working mum. And the book itself is really nicely designed.
However, I have to be careful how I use the book as it can turn me into a crazy lady. I suddenly want to make all my own cleaning products, make all the Christmas presents, make a scrapbook of our last family holiday, whilst looking effortlessly fabulous.

Joanna Gosling herself said:
‘My life isn’t perfect, no one’s is, but I think many women try to create a façade of perfection’

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/you/article-2045094/Interiors-special-The-busy-womans-guide-everything.html#ixzz2DqMaxLex

So I have to remember this, when I read the book.

If you struggle with this as much as I do these verses are for you:

Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10 Not, rush around like a lunatic and forget about God.

and

Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Matthew 6:32-34 Not, seek first your many projects and become slightly hysterical.

If our many activities are beginning to encroach on our relationship with God. If we are losing our sense of peace, we have learn to say 'no'. Sometimes this means saying 'no' to our own ridiculous expectations and sometimes this means saying 'no' to other people, who unintentionally make us feel pressurised.

I have not prioritised God recently. Reading my bible and spending time with God has not been very high on my to-do list. It's so easy for this to happen. But, when we do chose to put God first, if we stop and trust that He will help us to do what is necessary, everything will slot into place.

So chill! x